The Searching Game from Mr. Right
The dating game is like a wild roller coaster ride full of twists and turns as well as highs and lows. Many women have discovered an easier way to find Mr. Right. Doesn’t the saying go, “Date three to find the one?” By dating several candidates at once you have a higher chance of finding your future spouse. Many women feel conflicted regarding the idea of dating multiple men at the same time. They are afraid to hurt their feelings while searching for the right one. After browsing several websites, I have discovered almost all women agreed with the notion of dating different men to find their future husband.
Imagine dating as a mathematical game. Take away the romance, the fluff, the feelings, and you are left with a practical objective point of view. Men often think of dating as a business transaction. Following this method will save you time, heartbreak, and a thing we all struggle with: overanalyzing. This method will increase your success in the dating game.
Think of yourself as a salesperson and the men you are dating as customers. You are the product so show your best self, inside and out. If imagining yourself as a product feels strange, then think about shopping during Black Friday sales. Going on dates and shopping on the busiest day of the year requires competitive edge, appeal, and persistence. Remember, one of these guys could be the one so you should be willing to put everything on the line. Don’t waste his time or your own.
Many women believe they will be viewed differently and looked down upon for dating multiple men at once. However, as long as you are respecting their feelings and looking for qualities that will lead to a relationship, there is nothing wrong with avoiding becoming serious within the first couple dates.
There are several advantages to going on dates with different men while deciding who would be the best potential candidate for a long-lasting relationship. One of the advantages is speeding up the process of meeting the right person. Some women go on first dates and immediately feel sparks. However, others need a few dates before they feel chemistry. By dating different people you have a higher chance of finding the right person. Dating multiple people allows you to compare and contrast between them which also gives you a clearer perspective. Is one guy more considerate than the others? Is there one person who makes you laugh more than the rest? Is one guy always punctual while someone else may not be? These sort of things are easier to catch at the beginning versus later down the road.
Imagine a first date like a job interview. You are trying to make a solid first impression and want them to choose you to come back for a second interview. After many interviews, you become less afraid and more comfortable. The same can be said about first dates. The thought of going on multiple dates with different men may be daunting, but it will help you become more relaxed later on. Eventually, you will feel less petrified and able to focus more on your dates which will make it easier to get to know each suitor. After several dates, you will discover how to ask the right questions to determine whether you have a spark or learn he isn’t the right guy for you. Knowing you have a few dates coming up will lessen the make it or break it pressure.
A bonus to dating multiple guys is you can weigh your options without going mad and obsessing over one guy. No more psychoanalyzing everything that happens on the date, checking your phone every five minutes wondering why he hasn’t texted you back yet or stalking his social media pages. Instead of wasting your time, energy, and emotions on one guy, you should be dipping your toes in the sea of possible Mr. Rights. Ladies, you need quantity to find quality. After the first few dates, you can determine whether he is a potential candidate. Don’t let your life revolve around one guy. No guy is worth everything unless he’s Thor. If that’s the case then certainly let him become your whole world. Dating multiple guys at a time will prevent you from obsessing over one. You will become distracted which will stop you from putting your life on hold for one man.
A few drawbacks to dating different men are the emotional dangers. You should date as many people as you can handle, but don’t try to over exert yourself by saying yes or engaging every guy you see. Before getting too invested, you should know what you want ahead of time. I don’t mean a list of qualities you want from a man, which we all have mentally stored away for safe keeping. I mean a list of how you want to feel when around your potential suitors. Decipher whether you really like them or only like the way they make you feel. Another drawback is the fear of hurting the other people you are seeing. To avoid this just be honest. If one of the men you are dating asks if you are seeing anyone else, simply tell him yes.
Another disadvantage to dating multiple people is the stress of remembering all the dates. A way to solve this is by buying a calendar and writing down when you have a date with certain suitors. This will help keep things organized. A helpful tip would be avoiding double booking on the same night. If you are having trouble remembering their names then maybe you are dating too many people.
Avoid kissing and telling. Yes, you should be honest with the suitors you are dating. However, don’t tell them everything that happens between you and anyone else you’re seeing. The hardest drawback to dating more than one suitor is getting attached. Let’s face it, women become emotionally involved easier than men do. However, if you are in the process of dating a few people, I would advise keeping your emotions out of the equation. Especially if you don’t think he can be husband material. You are looking for Mr. Right, but you shouldn’t fall in love with any average Joe who isn’t compatible with you.
At the end of the day, there are more pros to dating around than cons. I know several people who have tried this method and are happily approaching their anniversaries. By dating more than one guy you can locate the winner out of a few losers. You will also have great stories to tell your girlfriends when you get together for coffee afterward. As long as you stop feeling guilty about dating different people, you will discover the multitude of pros compared to a few cons. Try to get to know the men you are dating. You can’t find Mr. Right if you aren’t trying to learn more about him. Dating multiple guys can be fun and exciting. Remember the feeling of going out, dressing up, and getting to meet someone new? If not, then you need to get back in the dating game. You will feel more confident and improve your dating skills the more dates you go on. If you are like most girls who fixate on one guy after the first few dates, this method will keep you from focusing on just one man before it’s an appropriate time. Dating more than one person will prevent you from being too available, which in turn, makes you more attractive.